A Very Possible Christmas

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By wallaceb
Mr. Dr P: Goggles! All right... let's do it.
Mrs. Dr P: Honey, it's beautiful.
Mr. Dr P: It's all Jim and Tim.
Jim: We just re-routed the Middleton power grid.
Tim: So we wouldn't blow out the whole town like last year.
Kim: Way to go, Tweebs.
Nana: Look... its Ronald! Oh dear, I think we blinded him.
Kim: I'd better go get him before he... Oh!
Ron: Thanks. So where are we in the Possible family Christmas Eve schedule?
Kim: Just started. Lighting the house is always first.
Ron: Right... yeah, I caught that.
Rufus: Eggnog? Oh!
Kim: Not yet, Rufus. Eggnog's after we sing carols, but before the Christmas skit.
Rufus: Oh!
Ron: You're forgetting the most important tradition of all...
Kim: "The Six Tasks of Snowman Hank."
Ron: Every Christmas, this couch, that TV and my favorite cartoon snowman.
Kim: It's on early?
Ron: It's the four-forty-five promo.
TV: For twenty years, "The Six Tasks of Snowman Hank," has warmed the hearts of children everywhere. But not anymore! Take a powder, Snowman, 'cause this year Christmas is a turbo-charged collision of cool. Live from the North Pole... it's "X-treme
X-mas!"
Jim: This could be e best Christmas ever.
Tim: Hoo-shah!
Ron: They cancelled Snowman Hank? No! How could they do it? How could they cancel Snowman Hank?
Kim: Maybe this'll cheer you up.
Ron: Um, is it a cartoon snowman who teaches kids the power of friend’s family and turning bad guys good?
Kim: Well, no. But, uh... hey, Happy Hanukkah!
Ron: For me? Rufus! You're on! He just loves unwrapping gifts. Wow. Hey! That's us!
Kim: It's a cyber-scrapbook. Do you like it?
Ron: It's... it's... it's badical.
Mr. Dr P: Kimmie-cub! We're singing carols.
Kim: Coming, Dad!
Ron: Go. Sing. I'm just gonna, I'm just gonna take a minute here.
Ron: Hey... Santa?
Wade: Ho-ho-ho! Oh, hey Ron. Sorry about Snowman Hank.
Ron: It stinks. And what's worse is Kim made me this perfect gift.
Wade: And you got the Bueno Nacho Bueno Bucks?
Ron: Well, she seemed to like them last year. So what's up?
Wade: Silent night. Just wanted to wish Kim a Merry Christmas. Thought I could catch her before carol time. Uh-oh.
Ron: What?
Wade: It looks like Shego just stole some kind of experimental power cell.
Ron: On Christmas Eve?
Wade: Definite naughty list.
Ron: Well, what are we gonna do? Christmas with the fam means everything to Kim.
Wade: Yeah, I know. Maybe Drakken knows that too. He must be up to something major.
Ron: Yeah, ruining Kim's Christmas!
Wade: You have to tell her.
Ron: I guess... no. No. Wait a minute. That's it!
Wade: What's it?
Ron: The absolutely perfect gift for Kim. Christmas with her family.
Wade: Then who's going to stop Drakken?
Ron: Me!
Wade: Uh-oh.
Rufus: Uh-oh.
Shego: Here you go chief, one stolen battery thing. Feliz Navidad.
Drakken: Excellent, Shego. Drak-Force One is complete and this time Kim Possible will not get in the way.
Shego: Okay. And why is that?
Drakken: Because it is Christmas. The one time of the year she is off-duty. Busy with her twinkle lights and mistletoe and carols and roast beast and frim franglers and zoob zooblers...
Shego: Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa... Doctor D.?
Drakken: What?
Shego: You've stopped using words.
Drakken: Oh. Right.
Shego: Right. Where's the sun block?
Drakken: In the mudroom. ...Wait. What do you want sun block for?
Shego: Uh, I'm on vacation now. Remember?
Drakken: But don't you want to stay to see the culmination of everything we've been working toward? Shego? Shego? Fine. I'll get me some "me time." Soon, I, Doctor Drakken, will rule the Yule! The world will have a blue Christmas! It's just not the same when I rant to myself.
TV: It's Extreme! It's X-mas! And it's tonight at eight!
Tweebs: We are so there!
Nana: You’re Grandfather and I got that one on our very first Christmas.
Kim: That's why it's my favorite... Did Ron go home?
Tweebs: Mm-mmm.
Ron: Thanks for the ride Captain Louis.
Louis: It's the least I can do, after you saved this old tub from sinking. Hold on. Kim Possible saved my tub from sinking.
Ron: Oh, that's right. And I'm always right there. You know... key man.
Louis: There was a fellow with her. Busted my radio. Used my navigational charts for a napkin. What was his name? Ron something.
Ron: Yes, yes, yes. "Ron Something." Sadly, Mr. Something didn't work out. We had to let him go. So, uh, I'll see ya, I'll see ya.
Mr. Dr P: Egg me, boys!
Jim: Launching eggs!
Mr. Dr P: We have achieved Eggnog, Hon!
Nana: Where's Ronald's little rat thing? Oh, he always loves the eggnog.
Kim: I guess they went home. Ron was pretty bummed about Snowman Hank. I hope he's all right. He didn't even say good-bye.
Ron: Boo-yah, we're in business. Come on. Come on. Oh, or I could just use the door.
Drakken: Here we go! Come on, come on, come on! Hmm? Hmm, hmm, hmm. You!
Ron: You want a piece of Ron?
Drakken: Excuse me. Thank you! Ow!
Ron: Oh, my eyebrow!
Drakken: Ooh! Don't pinch me!
Ron: Get your finger out... ow!
Computer: Initiating Launch sequence in five seconds... four... three...
Drakken: Finally, a holiday where I get what I want. Total global domination! This is going to be the best Christmas ever.
Ron: Alright, alright, let's see, let's see. Now this one looks good.
Computer: Commencing landing sequence.
Ron: Alright! Got it on the first try. Not bad.
Computer: Commencing take-off sequence. Commencing landing sequence. Commencing take-off sequence. Commencing landing sequence. Commencing take-off sequence. Commencing landing sequence. Commencing take-off... commencing... commencing... Please make up your mind.
Drakken: How's that, Mr. Smarty boots?
Computer: Initiating emergency system test. Launching escape pods. Initiating self destruct. Initiating bedtime sequence.
Ron: Wait a second... what was that?
Drakken: I don't know what you're talking about.
Ron: Before the Teddy Bear!
Computer: Self-destruct in twenty.
Drakken: Gah! What did you do? This was my chance to rule the world. All I want is what's coming to me. All I want is my fair share.
Ron: Self-destruct! Self-destruct!
Drakken: Chill out! I have escape pods.
Ron: "Had" escape pods, blue boy, we launched them.
Drakken: Okay... uh, wait! The garbage is jettisoned in an impact resistant container.
Ron: Oh... what?
Drakken: I said, it's an escape pod full of garbage.
Ron: Okay, works for me.
Computer: Self Destruct in five...
Ron: Land ho!
Drakken: No kidding.
Ron: We're alive!
Drakken: We did it!
Mr. Dr P: So, while General George Washington set about finding food and shelter for his men, Colonel Zim Possible snuck into the British camp to find a Christmas tree.
Jim: The Yuletide has turned, Redcoat.
Kim: Coming!
Delivery man: Kim Possible?
Kim: That's me. Thanks! Merry Christmas!
Delivery man: Would be if I didn't have to work.
Kim: I guess I shouldn't open it until it's officially Christmas.
Wade: No! It's Wade! Open me now!
Kim: A Kimmunicator? I've already got one.
Nana: Exchange it, dear. You can do very well in the after-Christmas sales.
Wade: Actually, your other one got destroyed in the stratosphere. Ron took it when he went to stop Drakken from launching his "Drak-Force One."
Kim: Whoa, Wade, rewind. Ron went on a mission... alone?
Wade: It was kind of a secret Santa thing. But listen, before the explosion satellites picked up escape pods. Ron's gotta be in one of them.
Kim: And these pods are where?
Wade: So far I only have fix on the first one. It's in London.
Kim: I have to go.
Mrs. Dr P: Of course you do.
Mr. Dr P: Don't worry; we'll hold the story of Colonel Zim until you come back.
Kim: No. Don't ruin your Christmas. I'll get Ron and... and... We’ll back in time for presents.
Ron: My fault? It's not my fault.
Drakken: This is so your fault.
Ron: What? I'm supposed to let you take over the world?
Drakken: In the spirit of the season, yes!
Drakken: Oh, you want to throw things now.
Ron: Ow! Stop it!
Drakken: You stop it.
Ron: You started it. Dude! Dude! Stop! That's a cell phone!
Drakken: Yes, it should leave quite a welt.
Ron: Oh, no! Not for throwing, for calling. Calling for help.
Shego: Uh... please, I'm on vacation.
Ron: Aah... must find food!
Drakken: Gah... went to voice mail. Um hello Shego, Dr. Drakken. I hope you're having a nice vacation. When you get a chance could you get up here to the North Pole and save me? Please? It's cold and windy and dark and we've got nothing to... That's my chicken!
Ron: Hey, you threw it away.
Kim: Thanks for the ride Mr. Nakasumi.
Yoshiko: Nakasumi-san says it is the least he can do, after you saved his video game factory in time for Christmas rush.
Kim: No big. I just hope I can save this Christmas.
Police: As I live and breathe, Kim Possible. 'Appy 'oliday, Luv. Merry Christmas.
Kim: Uh, could you tell me what happened to the guy who was in there?
Police: Weren't nobody in it.
Kim: Wade, we struck out in London. Where to?
Wade: Middle of the Mediterranean.
Kim: Swell. Wade?
Wade: Okay. One more in the Amazon.
Kim: Please let him be in it.
Mrs. Dr P: It's just not Christmas without Kimmie... is it?
Mr. Dr P: No, it's not.
Nana: You know what we have to do.
Mr. Dr P: Who's up for a ride in an untested hypersonic aircraft?
Tweebs: Hoo-shah!
Shego: Mmm... thanks. Here you go.
Waiter: No need. It's all been paid for.
Shego: It has? By who?
Waiter: A gentleman called and said he would cover your whole vacation.
Shego: "Shego, just my way of saying thanks for a super year and Merry Christmas! Yours in evil Doctor Drakken." Oh... that is so nice. Guess I should've taken his call. Oh, maybe he left a message.
Kim: What was...? Will you... ah... stop it. It's Christmas. Ron, get out of that pod and help me!
Tweebs: Whoa!
Kim: Jim? Tim? That's an anaconda!
Mrs. Dr P: She's right, boys! We'll take it from here!
Mr. Dr P: Just like the tug-of-war at the Possible Family picnic last summer.
Kim: I can't believe you guys.
Mrs. Dr P: Are you kidding? Why should you have all the fun?
Jim: Can we fight another snake?
Tim: Please?
Kim: Wade! My family's here.
Wade: I know. They called me for your coordinates. I'm getting a distress signal from that pod. Ron has to be in it.
Mr. Dr P: Well, good news there.
Kim: I'll get Ron. We'll all be home for Christmas dinner!
Jim: Can we borrow the Kimmunicator?
Kim: Why?
Tim: We wanna watch TV.
Jim: Please? "X-treme Xmas" is on.
Kim: Okay... but if Wade beeps in, you gotta answer it. Ron? Are you all right? Ron? Where are you?
Drakken: Name your price, Stoppable... power, glory. When I take over the world, you can have a continent. Any continent. Not Europe.
Ron: Good idea, Rufus. I want the phone.
Drakken: You drive a hard bargain.
Ron: Yes. Information? I'd like the number for 911. Immediately please!
Drakken: Whoa! Polar Bear!
Ron: Whoa! We did it. We got away.
Drakken: Oh, like this is so much better?
Ron: Hey, we're away from the thing which was about to eat us. In the words of a very wise snowman, "Put away those petty problems."
Drakken: "And embrace your fellow man."
Both: "And join the celebration all across this wonderful land."
Ron: You're a fan of Snowman Hank?
Drakken: I'm taping it.
Ron: Dude, didn't you hear? They cancelled it.
Drakken: Wha...ho…No! No! Never!
Ron: It's true.
Drakken: I can tell you this... in the little TV in my heart Snowman Hank will play forever.
Ron: If we survive... the memory of Snowman Hank will survive. For Snowman Hank!
Drakken: Snowman Hank.
Rufus: Oh brother.
Guy: Oh! That's extreme! Are you ready to be extreme?
Shego: Yeah, extremely annoyed. I need a snowmobile.
Guy: We're using 'em to be extreme!
Shego: This'll do.
Guy: Whoo! Now that's extreme! Follow her.
Mrs. Dr P: Kimmie, where's Ron?
Kim: I don't know... He, he wasn't there.
Jim: Was he with Dr. Drakken?
Kim: Yeah.
Tim: Maybe they're at the North Pole.
Kim: What?
Jim: Yeah. Shego's at the North Pole.
Tim: Yeah. She's on "X-treme Xmas."
Kim: She is?
Shego: Hey, Doctor D! Listen. I got a fix on the cell signal. Doctor D? Is that you? Shoot!
Kim: I see something.
Shego: Hey, aren't you supposed to be home bobbing for cider or something?
Kim: Not without Ron.
Shego: Loser.
Kim: Snowman Hank?
Ron: Nice Job, Rufus... Kim!
Kim: Come on. Nana's got a hyper-sonic aircraft waiting.
Ron: Your Nana's here?
Kim: Yeah... Mom, Dad, the tweebs...
Ron: Are you kidding? You were supposed to get to stay home and do all the Possible family stuff you do every year.
Kim: Ron, when I heard you went after Drakken alone...
Ron: You came to rescue me... and ruined your Christmas. Man.
Kim: Are you kidding me? Now the tweebs wanna wrestle an anaconda every year. This Christmas rocked. I mean it.
Ron: Really?
Kim: It was way better than the Bueno Nacho Bueno Bucks you gave me last year.
Shego: Are you two finished? Because I am not.
Guy: A battle royal fought in the snow reaches of the farthest north. Extreme. Okay... and fight.
Drakken: Nonsense! We were just about to sit down to dinner.
Guy: Dinner's not extreme.
Drakken: Yes it is. I made cupcakes. After you.
Shego: Uh... Doctor D, are you serious?
Drakken: Of course. Because... "to the people far and near..."
Ron: "Snowman Hank brought Holiday Cheer."
Kim: This is... this is... I don't know what this is.
Drakken: Look who's under the mistletoe!
Ron: Well... really it's some old parsley I found in the dumpster. But... oh.
Mrs. Dr P: Kimmie! Are you okay?
Drakken: The Possibles! Join us, won't you?
Nana: Isn't that Kimberly Ann's arch foe?
Mr. Dr P: Tis the season.
Drakken: Of course, once we enter the New Year, the truce is over. I'm going to open a bag of freak on all of you.
Jim: This is the weirdest Christmas ever.
Tim: Hoo-shah.
Drakken: Hey gang... It's not the turkey or the stuffing or the gifts around the tree.
Ron: It's a warm and fuzzy feeling that begins with you and me.
Drakken: So put away those petty problems ...and embrace you fellow man
All: And join the celebration all across this wonderful land. Have a ringling, tingling, Chris Cringling Christmas. Ring a ling a ling. Ring a ling a ling. Have a hop a long, sing a long happy holiday. And when the snow starts we'll hoist a hearty cheer for the rootingest, tootingest, halfalootingest favorite time of year. Yee ha.